and i have no idea if it's for the better. it's not sad. i just get apathetic at times. if apathetic is what you call the way i never cared.
ten years ago, i would've bitten your head off and gleefully chomped on your bones if you ever as much moved my coffee cup. now, i look at you and think of myself ten years ago. hah!
alright, so it was a pity to go down that low, but i was a slave to my emotions back then. i lived and breathed (got that!) with every swing of my mood. i was confrontational; to some degree, i still am. but i no longer exert the effort if i see there's no point in doing so. because i can only expend myself that much, and i choose to use that energy on things much more important in my life. i'd still receive you if ever you choose to open the confrontation line with me, though. heck, i might even offer you my homemade butter cookies. just don't expect me to apologize for being misunderstood.
priorities change through time. mine has changed a great deal. and if you're somebody who'd need emotional maintenance from me all the time, i might back off, do some reality checking, and ultimately, shrug and smile. but oh, if you're worth it, surely i'd never mind going an extra mile. but here's the thing. those who are worthy will never give me any reason to go that unnecessary extra mile. i don't know. i guess in the end, i just don't care about trivialities anymore.