Where the raindrops as they're falling tell a story...

Sunday, May 18, 2008

Mothers who hurt their kids don't deserve to be mothers

I was at the ticketing office this morning for three hours. Quite frankly, I did not expect I'd be waiting that long. Anyway the first two and a half hours of which was spent window shopping and actual shopping. The last 30 minutes, I stayed inside the ticketing office. It was there that I witnessed a scene. A mother hitting her daughter.

I was trying to enjoy Mr. Bean silent movie when out of the blue, I heard a thud, followed by a raised voice. She kept on hitting the daughter, who's probably around the age of 8 or 9, who apparently didn't do anything. From what I heard from the woman, who seemed to announce to the world what shameful act her daughter did, the girl asked for money. The girl got hungry and asked for money for some food. This irked the woman, shouting to the girl that it's not her (mother's) fault that she did not eat at the house before they went out. And don't she dare touch the money inside the purse or else. She went on and on with her litany and every time she wanted to stress a point, she'd hit the girl with her bare hands.

I'm not sure if this was hormonal, but my reaction surprised me. It's not that I don't usually react to abusive parents displaying their abusive behavior in public like it's something to emulate, but I was actually about to cry right there and then. It was all I could do to stop myself from coming over to them and get the girl away from the woman's wicked clutches. I stared at the woman, and if looks could kill, she'd have died several times over. I actually "shouted" for her to stop but judging from how she was so engrossed at her own emotion, she never heard me. Fearing that I'd cause a scene in a seemingly decent place, I held on to my seat, and silently prayed for karma. Personally, there can never be enough explanation for hitting a child. It's just unacceptable.

For one, that baby never asked to be born. It was the grownups' decision or indecision that brought her out to this world. Secondly, a child is helpless. They can never hit you back as hard try as they might. They can never defend themselves. Isn't that enough for irresponsible adults to stop?

Grownups should have lived long enough to know that once that child come to age, she will never remember the reason for the physical punishment. All she'll ever remember was she was punished, she was hurt by somebody she loved and trusted; and that she can never recall why. Oh, she'll remember that she was embarrassed in a public place. One way or another, she will grow to resent that person. She will learn to hate that person, because, hell, she was given a reason to. That child will grow angry. Granting she won't get over it, she will form the notion that hitting is OK, and she will do the same to her children. Like any other abusive relationship model, it is a vicious cycle. Violence will never end.

There are a hundred and one more reasons why violence is never an answer. I know I haven't lived long enough to say that I've been there, still this I know: talking to a child calmly, especially those that are already old enough to understand, is way better than inflicting physical harm to get your point across. Spanking will only hurt the child, and certainly will never make you feel good about yourself afterwards (unless you're some kind of perv). Otherwise, you are never fit to be a parent to begin with.



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